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Overstimulated and addicted is the new normal

Writer's picture: DoraDora

We live in an interesting time. We have more awareness and discussion around addiction and drugs than at any time prior, yet we simultaneously are somehow blind to our own addictions.

For the most part, our culture taught us how to see and thankfully no longer feel taboo if we need help kicking drug, alcohol, or sex addiction. But we don't see our everyday habits as something equally based on addiction.


I am not saying anything earth-shattering new. We all know this. However, as a mindfulness teacher, it is my job to point out the obvious; maybe in this coming year, you will decide to make some changes.


We are all overstimulated as a culture and addicted, yes, addicted. Yes, you!

You don't believe me? Answer these questions;


  1. Can you stand one day of silence without music, television, or computers? Just you and the chores, work, kids, nature, whatever. No other noise.

  2. Can you drive for an hour in silence?

  3. Can you go without news for one week?

  4. Can you NOT touch alcohol after a hard day or after somebody hurt your feelings?

  5. Can you not touch sweets when they are out on the table?

  6. Do you react defensively if I tell you you cannot have sweets for a month? Not even a bite!

  7. Do you crave comfort foods?

  8. Do you busy yourself with activities to avoid a tough task or feeling?

  9. Do you look at the "feed" on social media for more than 1-3 min per day?

  10. Do you look at your social media every time you have a pause in life?

  11. Do you post what you do all the time on social media? (yes, that is also addiction, a craving to have confirmation of attention that you are special. We should be able to have an internal focus for self-validation...)

  12. Are you constantly focusing on yourself? Getting massages, going to the doctor, getting pampering, getting further external "self-improvement."

  13. Do you feel life is boring? Do you need something fun to do all the time?

  14. When you are done with one experience (vacation, theatre, friends), are you right away planning the next to keep "fun and entertainment" in life? Do you feel down, empty, and depressed if you don't have your next plan?


The list could go on, but I think you get the point. Our culture is geared to teach you to avoid your feelings and mask whatever internal difficulty is going on with stuff. Humans are amazingly creative; we can even take yoga and mindfulness and make that the stuff through which we avoid life. Yes, yoga and meditation can be a form of addiction and self-soothing, therefore, classified as addiction.


Here is something that I repeat a 1000 times in my Mindfulness and Meditation classes:


Mindfulness practices increase our capacity to bear experience rather than decreasing the intensity.

Addiction – our desire to mask the unpleasant experience. But avoided material cannot be processed.

To heal – we need to avoid avoidance


As I said, we are all addicted to something because human beings tend to run away and avoid discomfort.


Thus, we can all benefit from a bit of introspection and find ways to learn habits that serve us better.

Our culture is full of things for sale that guarantee that we will "feel better." Even mindfulness in the mainstream is trying to present itself as a tool for happiness.

But these "life hacks" are, at best, a temporary relief.

Life is a battleground where you are supposed to find meaning and be a constructive, peaceful participant in society.


It would be easier to sell happiness; our addiction-prone mind wants to avoid discomfort and cover up the difficulties with the happy. I could have written you a blog about how yoga is all about love and how I love everybody. Such writings bring 30 seconds of pleasure for the reader. But loving everybody is baloney! It is an unreal, empty sentence. Nobody loves everybody. This nonsense, feel-good, avoidance-driven cliche is sweeping New Age culture, and it is simply empty silliness.

I can forgive, I can hold space, and I can see dignity in everyone. But I don't love you all. Nah, some humans are just difficult; all we can do is hold space! Heck, some people find me difficult.

Honesty is an essential first step. It is very easy to say that I love everyone; these fashionable cliches cost nothing for the ego. However, loving one person is a sacrifice that takes work.


So let's stay away from cliches, shall we? And plunge into reality. Let's learn mindfulness techniques that will have a lasting effect on your life.

If you do the work, I promise you will find something better than fleeting happiness; you will find joy and meaning that sustains you through the tough times.


Curious how?

I wrote 40 Days of Mindfulness and Nutrition to help you with this journey. Click here for more info and to sign up.


Happy New Year,

Dora


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